Sometimes, the answer lies tucked away in unexpected corners of our sacred literature. Take the tradition of the seven-day wedding celebration, the sheva brachot. Where did that come from?
Well, Rabbi José, in Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer, a fascinating early medieval text, points us to two possible sources. The first is none other than our patriarch, Jacob.
Remember the story? Jacob, madly in love with Rachel, agrees to work seven years for her father, Laban, in exchange for her hand in marriage. But, in a cruel twist, Laban substitutes Rachel with her older sister, Leah, on the wedding night. Jacob, understandably upset, confronts Laban, who agrees to give him Rachel as well, but only after another seven days of celebration for Leah!
So, as Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer 16 tells us, Jacob "made a banquet with rejoicing for seven days, and he took Leah (as his wife). Again he kept another seven days of banquet and rejoicing, and took Rachel (as his wife), as it is said, "And Laban gathered together all the men of the place, and made a feast" (Genesis 29:22)."
What's really striking is the divine reward connected to this act. The text says, "The Holy One, blessed be He, said to them: Ye have shown loving-kindness to Jacob, My servant. I will give a reward to your children, so that there be no reward for the wicked in the world to come." This loving-kindness shown to Jacob, this dedication to celebration even amidst trickery, earns the Israelites a special merit. The text continues, "Because by him the Lord had given victory unto Syria" (2 Kings 5:1), linking this original act of celebration to later blessings.
But Jacob isn't the only example offered. The text then turns to Samson, the legendary strongman.
"From whom do we learn (that there should be) seven days of banquet? From Samson the Nazirite of God," says Rabbi José. When Samson goes down to the land of the Philistines and takes a wife, he too, keeps seven days of banquet and rejoicing. "And it came to pass, when they saw him, that they brought thirty companions to be with him" (Judges 14:11). What were they doing? Eating, drinking, and rejoicing, as evidenced by the riddle Samson poses to them, "Let me now put forth a riddle unto you" (Judges 14:12), a riddle they couldn't solve for three whole days (Judges 14:14)!
So, what are we to make of all this? Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer connects the joy of weddings and celebrations to core figures in our tradition. It suggests that these moments of feasting and togetherness are not just social customs, but acts of chesed, of loving-kindness, that resonate with the divine. And perhaps, just perhaps, those moments of joy ripple through time, connecting us to Jacob, to Samson, and to the very fabric of our people's story.
Next time you're at a wedding, surrounded by friends and family, remember these stories. Remember the seven days of celebration, and the echoes of joy that stretch back through generations. Maybe that's what the sheva brachot are really about: connecting us not just to each other, but to the enduring spirit of celebration within the Jewish people.