“It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting; for that is the end of all men, and the living will take it to heart” (Ecclesiastes 7:2). “It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting.” Why? It is because “the heart of the wise is in a house of mourning” (Ecclesiastes 7:4), as anyone who mourns, the Holy One blessed be He brings him joy, as it is stated: “The humble will increase their joy in the Lord” (Isaiah 29:19).
Another matter, “it is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting” – it is better to adopt a mode of conduct for which there is a recompense, than a mode of conduct for which there is no recompense.27Just as one pays respects to the dead, others will pay their respects to him when he dies. But regarding feasting, it is not clear that he who attends a feast will himself conduct a feast.
It is better to adopt a mode of conduct that serves the living and the dead, than a mode of conduct that serves only the living. It is better to adopt a mode of conduct that serves both the wealthy and the poor, than a mode of conduct that serves only the wealthy. It is better to adopt a mode of conduct that involves consolation, than a mode of conduct that does not involve consolation.