Why the Rabbis Always Dance at Weddings

Midrash Aggadah Gaster, Exempla No. 269; Bereshit Rabbah 18:1

Curated by The Jewish Mythology Team · Published January 11, 2025

Rabbi Judah bar Ilai was known for many fine qualities, but one of them became a teaching in itself. Whenever a bridal procession passed through the streets, Rabbi Judah would stop whatever he was doing, even if he was in the middle of studying Torah, and join the dancing.

His students were surprised. A sage of his stature, leaving the beit midrash to twirl with strangers at a wedding?

Rabbi Judah taught them why.

At the first wedding in history, he said, there were only two human guests — Adam and Eve — and only one shadchan, one matchmaker: the Holy One Himself. God built Eve's body from Adam's side, braided her hair, dressed her in bridal ornaments, and led her to the waiting groom (Bereshit Rabbah 18:1). God stood in as the best man at the world's first wedding.

From that moment, said Rabbi Judah, every Jew at a wedding is imitating HaKadosh Baruch Hu. To escort the bride, to cheer the groom, to dance until you sweat — this is not frivolity. It is one of the few mitzvot in which we follow God's own example from the day of creation (Gaster, Exempla No. 269).

So Rabbi Judah set down his books when the music started. He knew that Torah could wait five minutes, but the bride could not.

The teaching is small and bright: dancing at a wedding is not a distraction from holiness. It is holiness wearing its best clothes.

Themes

Marriage Rabbis Adam & Eve Community Holidays

Continue Reading

Midrash Aggadah Why Every Jew Is Full of Pious Deeds Like a Pomegranate A min, a sectarian or heretic, came to Rabbi Kahana with a pointed question. Jewish law permits a husband and wife to li... Midrash Aggadah Eight Rabbinic Proverbs on How to Be a Mensch The Talmud and early midrashic collections preserve rabbinic mishlei, proverbs, in loose clusters — one-line teachings m... Midrash Aggadah Adam Names the Animals But Finds No Helper The naming finished. Targum Pseudo-Jonathan on (Genesis 2:20) closes the scene with a quiet loneliness: "Adam called the... Midrash Aggadah Why Purim Is a Day of Gifts for the Poor of Israel Although the reading of the Book of Esther — the Megillah — on Purim is not commanded anywhere in the Pentateuch, the Ra... Midrash Aggadah The Sage Who Skipped Study to Feed a Legion Simeon the Temanite — a Sage from Teman, a region in ancient Arabia where Jews had lived for centuries — was a regular f... Midrash Aggadah Rachel, Akiva, and the Waterfall That Wore Down Stone Before Rabbi Akiva became the greatest sage of his generation, he was an illiterate shepherd in the employ of Calba Savu... Midrash Aggadah A Betrothed Couple Sold as Slaves Who Kept Their Vow A short, chilling ma'aseh from the rabbinic tradition, preserved as exemplum no. 73 in Moses Gaster's 1924 collection Th... Midrash Aggadah Rachel's Whispered Consent That Made Akiva Great For twelve long years Rabbi Akiva had studied Torah far from home, leaving behind his wife Rachel, who had married him w... Midrash Aggadah What Has God Been Doing Since Creation Finished A Roman matrona — a noblewoman who liked to corner rabbis with hard questions — came to Rabbi Joshua and asked him somet...