It turns out, our sages have been wrestling with that feeling for centuries.

Rabbi Yoḥanan opens with a powerful proverb: "One who repays good with evil, evil will not move from his house" (Proverbs 17:13). It’s a stark warning, isn't it? He then dives into a practical example: if a friend welcomes you with a humble meal of lentils, you should repay their hospitality with a more lavish offering of meat. The key, he says, is that they showed you kindness first. This act of initiating kindness is so important that our response should ideally be even greater than the initial gesture.

Why is this so important? Because, as Rabbi Shimon bar Abba points out, the verse applies not only to repaying good with evil, but even repaying evil with evil! That’s quite a statement.

Rabbi Alexandri takes us to the Torah itself, specifically Exodus 23:5: "If you see the donkey of your enemy crouching under its burden, shall you refrain from assisting him? You shall surely assist him." Even towards someone who has wronged you, you have a mitzvah, a commandment, to act with kindness. Choosing not to do so, choosing to repay good with evil—that’s when "evil will not move..." from your house.

This idea isn't just abstract ethical musing, though. Rabbi Berekhya interprets this verse in the context of the generations of the Flood and the Tower of Babel (the Dispersion). After the Flood, the Torah tells us, "the entire earth was of one language and of common speech" (Genesis 11:1). Having a common language, safa achat, is a tremendous advantage, a gift, even. Yet, how did those generations repay God's kindness? By building a tower to defy Him, an act of ultimate ingratitude.

So, what's the takeaway here? It’s a reminder that kindness, initiating it and reciprocating it, is a fundamental building block of a just and harmonious world. Failing to recognize and respond to kindness, even small acts of generosity, can have profound consequences. It's about recognizing the inherent value in connection and reciprocal support, and acting accordingly. As we find in Bereshit Rabbah 38, our actions ripple outwards, shaping not just our own lives but the world around us. What ripples are we creating?