Even Moses, the great lawgiver, felt that sting.
We often think of Moses as this towering figure, unflinching in his faith, boldly confronting Pharaoh and leading the Israelites through the desert. But the stories we find in Legends of the Jews, that amazing collection of rabbinic tales compiled by Louis Ginzberg, remind us that he was also just a man, with his own vulnerabilities and insecurities.
Ginzberg tells us that Moses deeply desired that Joshua be appointed as his successor. Can you imagine? To hand over the reins after leading your people for forty years? That takes a special kind of humility. It also speaks to Moses' profound love for Joshua.
But here’s the heartbreaking part: Moses couldn’t bring himself to voice this wish to God. Why? Because he remembered a previous incident, a moment of perceived failure. Remember back when God first called Moses to liberate the Israelites from Egypt? Moses had pleaded with God to send Aaron instead. He felt inadequate, unsure of his own abilities. And God, though ultimately granting Moses his request to include Aaron, had also shown displeasure.
The memory of that divine rebuke lingered, casting a long shadow.
The text says, "He was like the child who had once been burned by a coal, and the seeing a brightly sparkling jewel, took it to be a burning coal, and dared not touch it.” Isn't that a powerful image? A past experience, a perceived failure, can make us wary of even the most beautiful opportunities. A shimmering jewel, something meant to bring joy and fulfillment, is mistaken for a source of pain.
Moses’ silence speaks volumes. It reveals a man wrestling with his past, hesitant to make himself vulnerable again. The desire to see Joshua succeed him was a "brightly sparkling jewel," but the fear of repeating his past mistake held him back.
And that, my friends, is the human condition in a nutshell. We all carry our past with us, sometimes letting it dictate our present and future. But perhaps, like Moses, acknowledging our fears is the first step to overcoming them and reaching for the jewels that await us. The midrash, the traditional Jewish story, reminds us that even our greatest heroes are still, at their core, just like us.