The coat of many colors, the jealousy, the betrayal... But what about those first few hours after that fateful act?
According to Legends of the Jews, that amazing compilation of rabbinic tales gathered by Louis Ginzberg, the brothers were almost immediately filled with regret. Can you imagine? One minute they're rid of their troublesome brother, the next, they're chasing after the Midianites who bought him, desperate to undo what they'd done! They wanted to ransom him, buy him back. But alas, their efforts were in vain. The caravan was too far ahead. The die had been cast.
Meanwhile, Reuben, the eldest, was nowhere to be seen during the sale. Where was he? Well, the text tells us that he was deeply involved in teshuvah, repentance. He was praying, studying Torah, trying to atone for a previous transgression against his father, Jacob. Because of this, he hadn't been present with his brothers, tending the flocks. And so, he missed the whole, terrible event.
Reuben’s absence sets the stage for a dramatic discovery. His first thought was to check the pit. Maybe, just maybe, Joseph was still there. He planned to rescue him secretly, returning him to Jacob without the other brothers knowing. So, he goes to the pit, stands at the edge, and calls out, "Joseph! Joseph!"
Silence.
No answer.
Reuben fears the worst. Maybe Joseph died of fright down there, alone in the dark. Or perhaps a snake bit him. Horrified, he climbs down into the pit, only to find it… empty. Neither living nor dead. Just… gone.
He climbs back out, tears his clothes in mourning, and cries out in anguish, "The lad is not there! What am I going to tell my father if he's dead?" He understands that as the eldest, he will be held responsible.
Then, Reuben returns to his brothers, distraught. Imagine the scene: the guilt-ridden brothers, the devastated eldest son. They confess everything. They tell him how they tried to undo their terrible deed, how they failed.
It's a powerful moment, isn't it? The immediate aftermath of a terrible decision, the crushing weight of regret, the desperate attempts to make things right, all ultimately falling short. It reminds us that our actions have consequences, sometimes irreversible ones. And that even in the darkest of moments, the possibility of teshuvah, of turning back towards the light, always remains. Even if, in this case, it was just a little too late.