Our guide? None other than Bereshit Rabbah 93, a treasure trove of rabbinic interpretations on the Book of Genesis. Specifically, we're looking at the moment Judah "approached" (vayigash) Joseph. Now, that word "approached"… it's loaded. What kind of approach was it?

Rabbi Yehuda sees it as an approach for war, citing a verse from II Samuel (10:13) where vayigash is used to describe advancing into battle. Rabbi Nehemya, however, interprets it as an approach for conciliation, like the tribe of Judah approaching Joshua in Joshua 14:6 to appease him. And the Rabbis? They see it as an approach for prayer, like Elijah approaching God in I Kings 18:36.

Rabbi Elazar, bless his heart, offers a unifying interpretation. Judah, he says, was ready for anything: war, conciliation, or prayer. He was prepared to do whatever it took to get Benjamin back. That’s some serious commitment.

Then Judah says, "Please, my lord (bi adoni)..." And the Rabbis really unpack this. It's not just polite phrasing. Judah is offering himself as a substitute! "Take me (bi) and not him (bei)!" He’d fill the water jugs, he'd do the hard labor, he'd chop the wood. He was arguing that he would be a better servant than Benjamin.

But there’s more simmering beneath the surface. Judah accuses Joseph of injustice (baya), saying, "You said, 'Bring him down to me, [and I will set my eye upon him]' (Genesis 44:21); is this the setting of an eye? It is the opposite of what you said! It is blindness of the eye." In other words, you obscured the truth from us.

Rabbi Simon adds that Judah is pointing out that Joseph is acting unjustly by demanding Benjamin as a slave when he has the means to pay for the alleged theft. It's against Jewish law: "If he has nothing, he shall be sold for his theft" (Exodus 22:2).

And then things get really intense. Judah reminds Joseph that Pharaoh and his household were afflicted with leprosy because Pharaoh abducted Sarah (Genesis 12:17). He warns Joseph to be careful. He also mentions Rachel's death, connecting it to Jacob's curse in Genesis 31:32. It's like Judah is throwing every possible argument, every historical precedent, at Joseph, trying to shake him.

Judah even brings up the story of how he and his brothers destroyed an entire city because of Dinah. He suggests that Joseph might be considering something even worse against Benjamin. He’s saying, “We did it for a woman, and this is for a man?" According to Etz Yosef, Judah suspected Joseph intended to sexually abuse Benjamin and considered homosexual abuse to be worse than Shekhem’s abuse of Dina or Pharoah's intent to abuse Sarah.

Another interpretation of "May your servant please speak (yedaber na)..." from Rabbi Yirmeya bar Shemaya is that Judah is threatening to bring pestilence (dever) upon Egypt if Joseph doesn't relent! Rabbi Hanin adds the image of Judah in a rage, so powerful that his hair rips through his garments and he spits out iron as dust!

Judah even dares to compare Joseph to Pharaoh, accusing him of making empty decrees and, shockingly, lusting after males. He then asserts his own power, reminding Joseph that his father is king in Canaan and he is second to him. He declares that if he draws his sword, he will start with Joseph and then move on to Pharaoh himself!

But that last threat almost backfires. Because Judah said he would start with Joseph and then go after Pharaoh, Joseph gives a signal to Manasseh, who stomps his foot, causing the entire palace to shake! Judah recognizes this as a sign of immense power, something only his family possesses. Realizing he can’t win through force, Judah finally softens his tone and begins to speak gently: "My lord asked..." (Genesis 44:19).

What a rollercoaster, right? This passage from Bereshit Rabbah gives us a glimpse into the depth of feeling, the layers of argument, and the raw power dynamics at play in this pivotal moment. It reminds us that even in the most familiar stories, there's always more to uncover, more to understand, and more to be amazed by. It makes you wonder, doesn't it, what hidden depths lie beneath the surface of our interactions, our negotiations, our pleas? What "approaches" are we really making?